Chachi or Didi?

Chachi, in Hindi, means Aunt/Aunty.

Didi, in Hindi, means Sister.

While in fact I am a Chachi, the term is generally reserved for the older crowd, one I don't yet accept being a part of. Both are considered terms of endearment but which one is really more endearing?

When I first came to India, little girls would call me Didi. As in, big sister. All that came to an end on Saturday when I met a friend of mine and his niece. He asked his niece, "Is she a Chachi or a Didi?" and she replied with "Chachi." My heart plummeted.

Granted the little girl is probably 9 years old, which makes me the same age my mother was when I was 9 years old, and we all know how old our mothers seemed when we were young. Here's a Then and Now photo of me when I came here in 2011 and just two years later. In fact, I'm gonna post pictures of me wearing the same dress to really make you scrutinize! You be the judge.

Last Wednesday








Then (2011)











Okay, so perhaps the hijab makes me a tad more "cherubic." But Aunty?!?!

There's No Such Thing As Free Size!



Patiala

Before I moved to India, I shopped like a fool. I was really worried I wasn't going to find much in the way of western wear that would fit. Even by US standards, I'm not a half-pint. I generally prefer an XL size and was certain that an XL in India was NOT the same as an XL in the states. I was right. When it comes to Indian clothing dubbed as "traditional wear" I don't struggle too much. I can find kurtis, leggings and patialas that suit me just fine, although some run a little short as I'm taller then you're average Desi. Overall though it's not an issue. Generally when shopping, I immediately seek out the largest size available and see if that will work. As is the case everywhere, size by brand varies, but I've found some brands that fit really well and try to stick to those.

What is an issue, however, is this concept of "free size." The only thing that should be dubbed as "free size" are handbags and scarves. Nothing else should be in that category. Yet in India, when I ask the sales girl, "What's the largest size you have?" I often get a response like "Okay madam, no problem. It's free size." It's a dress, there's no chance it can be free size! I've been given this response when shopping for everything from anarkalis (see Say Yes To The Dress) to t-shirts. That's the same as saying what fits my 5'8 XL frame is going to fit my sister in laws 5'2 S frame. It's not gonna happen!

One size does not fit all!

Today I was browsing an Indian retailers website, searching for some long sleeved t-shirts. They had an awesome collection and offered what I was looking for in every color of the rainbow. The problem: the t-shirts were "free size." Take a look at the photo to the left and tell me if the mannequin and I wear the same size? The same website has full sleeve shrugs, which is another item I've been searching for. Again, in free size. I'd be like the hulk trying to get out of this thing!

I can assure you, one size does NOT fit all. I really can't understand why clothing manufacturers would even have such a thing. Especially clothing manufacturers that specialize in women's clothing when half the allure of the outfit, is in how it fits! Granted tailors are abundant here and you can always have something taken in or hemmed, but you can never make it bigger and I can assure you, you itty bitty sales girl, there is no such thing as free size and it is a problem! 

Weight Watchers

One thing Indians are never afraid to comment on is your weight. Not their weight. Yours. As in: Mine.

 

Before visiting India the first time in 2010, I went Paleo and lost like 40 pounds, so that's good. But of course, I had a life prior to the weight loss, and photos of that life are posted on Facebook. Two years later, people still feel the need to comment on that. Not like you'd hear in the US "Hey, have you lost weight? You look great!" but more like "Hey, I saw your photos on Facebook. You used to be really FAT!"

 

But I've heard so many other comments as well. Even since moving here in 2011, people are convinced I've lost weight (when in fact I've gained and nowyouknow). I haven't been the to gym in almost two years and thanks to genetics, pretty much everything I've gained has divvied itself up between my face and my belly. A while back I was chatting with two co-workers, who again commented that since I've come India I've lost weight, but added "You still have your belly though. You'll have that after marriage."

 

Recently I took a two month leave from work following surgery. I basically sat home and ate while I was recovering and since we all know the geography of my weight gain, it showed. While I was sure people would notice, I failed to realize/recognize/remember how many people would feel the need to comment on it. My favorite comment of all, came from a peer, who within five minutes of seeing me after almost 8 weeks, looked me up and down and simply said "Wow. You got FAT!"

 

I couldn't argue. But at least I've heard enough comments about my figure to take it in stride.